It’s personal

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Do you have a favorite movie quote that plays in your head on occasion? I have a couple, mine lately has been from the movie TOP GUN when Cougar says, ” Sir, I’m holding on too tight, I’ve lost the edge.”  This week, especially, it played over and over in my head on a constant loop.

To understand we have to rewind about 6 days when the lovely blog, Young House Love, hosted a Giveaway for Albiedesigns.  A few months ago I signed on  to do one with them hoping to bring people to my site. However, I had NO idea just how many people it would send my way. Over a period of 5 days I had upward of 50,000 visitors browse my little shop. Amazing, YES!! However, I was unprepared for the volume that comes with that kind of exposure. It drove home the fact that my little hobby job, is no longer just a hobby or part-time. Honestly, It’s been like that for the past 6 mths, but I’ve continued to wear a”part-time” windbreaker, when I need to be wearing a full-time parka. While business has certainly ebbed and flowed, and will continue to, it’s been the reason why I have been reluctant to get help. I guess I was waiting for the right time, and now it seems that time has come.

I also had an epiphany this week, that made me feel a little less crazy.  It hit me like a freight train, the reason why these past few years (since starting Albiedesigns) have been such a wild ride of emotions, it’s because both of my jobs are so extremely personal.  My jobs as mommy and artist literally run though my blood, and I am consumed with passion for both. Making that roller coaster (which we all ride with our jobs) that much more thrilling and terrifying at the same time. I do realize that all parents experience that kind of crazy passion for their kids. The difference for me has more to do with being an artist.  When I worked as a recruiter, my job did not come from a place deep down in my core. I was of course driven to succeed, but that’s b/c I wanted to do well. Now, as an artist with every print that I sign, pack and ship I literally feel a little piece of me going out the door. I know, cheesy and a bit dramatic, but it’s the way I honestly feel. So you can imagine it was a huge relief to finally piece together why I am holding on so tightly, and fighting a constant feeling that I could lose it at any point. 🙂

To that end please allow me to share with you some personal takeaways from this week in both words and paint:

1. Find help, ask for help, and accept help.

2. Let go, enjoy your success as it comes, and don’t let your losses (big and small) consume you or take away from your wins.

3. The paintings above are more of the children’s gauche/watercolors that I have been working on.

Thanks for listening and looking!

–Kim

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